I do jigsaw puzzles. I admit it, I’m a nerd.
And I swear every time I open a puzzle, there is one piece that I am certain does not belong in this puzzle. I have this elaborate picture in my mind of someone walking through the puzzle factory and finding a piece lying on the ground. They pick it up and drop it into the closest puzzle box on the conveyor belt, but of course, it doesn’t go in that puzzle, and I have it. And then I work some more and I realize that that isn’t a man’s hat, it’s the front of this car right here.
Sometimes, the Bible is like that puzzle piece. You read a verse or you hear a story, and it just doesn’t make sense, and then one day, you hear it again, and you go, Oh, yeah.
We had left Hot Springs and gone back to Lone Star even though we didn’t have jobs lined up at Lone Star because we wanted to be near our families. We found jobs but they weren’t good jobs, and they didn’t pay much, and then, as I mentioned before, I got hurt.
I never handle being unemployed well. Not having money is hard enough, not being able to contribute to the family, and the boredom does me in. This time it was even worse. It’s amazing how much you can’t do without your right middle finger. I couldn’t even wash dishes. I wasn’t only bored, I felt completely useless.
On top of all that, there was something wrong with my car, and when I had money, I couldn’t find a mechanic who could figure it out. Now I didn’t have any money, and the car was just getting worse and worse and now I had to drive to Dallas for weekly visits to the doctor. And I hate driving a car when I’m not altogether sure it’s going to arrive at our destination.
I was not handling the whole situation well. I wasn’t sleeping, I was short tempered and grumpy. I was not being the person I wanted to be.
I did make it to Chapel a few times before the money ran out, and one week Chaplain Sam talked about the story of Caleb and Joshua and the Land of Canaan (Numbers Chap 13 & 14). If I had heard this story before, it had been a long time, and I’m sure I never sat down and examined it. Chaplain Sam’s main point was that we need to be brave and step up and take the things that God offers us.
But I saw something else. This seems to happen to me a lot. I looked at the statement We can’t go over there, there are Giants there.
God knew about the grapes so heavy they had to be carried on a pole. He knew about the pomegranates and the figs. But He also knew, when He told them He was giving them this land, that there was Giants there. He knew about the Giants, and He knew they could take the land anyway.
So when I’m feeling really discouraged, thinking things like maybe I don’t belong in horse racing. Maybe I am too old, too weak, too female, I have to remember that God knew all of this about me when He led me there. He knew about the Giants I would be meeting along the way, and He led me here anyway.
When Paul was going about doing good, some people got so wrapped up in his healing that they started taking things, like the rags he wiped his face with and using these to perform miracles of their own. There were seven priest brothers who were particularly well known for it.
One day they were asked to knock the demons out of a guy, and they were doing their act, and the demon came out and said “I know God, and I’m acquainted with Paul, but who are you?” (Acts 19:11-15)
When I heard that the other day, in Bible Study, I almost slapped the table. But I thought it would disturb the others so I restrained myself. The Chaplain wanted to talk about using items like magic, but what I heard was Who are you?
If you don’t have a personal relationship with God, you can wave all the magic rags in the world. You can sing the songs and say the words and shake the hands and do all the right things. But if the heart is not there, if God is not directing your path, if God doesn’t know your personally, there is no act you can perform that will mean a thing.
Do not be afraid. Just believe. Mark 5:36 [God's Word]
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